Tuesday

2013/01/16

My Facebook status update today read : “That sad moment when auto correct is funnier than what you wanted to type…” and that got me thinking…wouldn’t it be great if we had auto-correct for our lives, and not just for the meaningless drivel we spew out in constant textual harassment of each other?

Just think…about to buy three take-out meals for yourself, Life Auto-Correct will cancel the order for two of them, saving you money, weight issues and a blight on your soul as you engage yet again with one of the seven deadlies*. Or on a clear stretch of highway, as you kick it down a gear and feel the power of the turbo push you back into your seat, Life Auto-Correct will still give you the rush, but ease off on the power so that you save fuel and don’t get a fine or worse.

Oh, I know what you’re thinking – it’s called self-discipline, listening to your conscience and being all growed-up**  – but those things are predicated in my actually taking note of them: they are passive traits demanding my active engagement. What I need is Life Auto Correct, that just does it all for me. I’ll be passive while it actively fixes my life.

Wonder if Apple has the patent on it already?

* yes it’s a made up word – it’s called poetic licence and is allowed.

** annoying, child-like grammar is intentional, and may even be ironic.

© Dave Luis 2013. All Rights Reserved.