No, I don’t feel like being sensible about stuff. I don’t want to tread lightly around the sensitivities when it feels like the world tramples all over mine.
I don’t want to eat sensibly, or small portions.
I don’t want to smile and be nice.
I don’t want to hold back, keep silent, be patient, go running, drink water, think positive, be kind.
I want this all to go away and I just want to do whatever TF I feel like doing, carefree and free from scrutiny and consequences.
That’s what I want.
I sound like a spoiled, rotten, detestable brat.
Today was damned hard, pretending at being an adult with all my shit together.
I am too tired now to contemplate and articulate and unpack and move forward.
Aaaargh! What’s the bloody point, anyway? Be positive? You still die in the end. Be an ass? Same outcome.
Right, I’m going to my room, so no one will see me sulking.
©️ Dave Luis 2018. All Rights Reserved.
Excellent.
This one was pure word vomit. Maybe some stuff should go into a journal, rather than online?
Whats up Davey Dave?
Hey Gords. Been a rough few weeks. Doing therapy again and using my blog to write out all the stuff in my head. More than likely most of this stuff belongs in journal, not online.