I guess I knew early on today that I was going to fall off the wagon.

The choice became not IF I was going to cheat on my new eating plan, but how. 

I’m far more picky about what I put in my body these days, so greasy, revolting fried chicken or sad cardboard burgers from the drive-thru were never going to be on the menu tonight. 

I decided to head to the opposite extreme and took myself to Belthazar at the V&A Waterfront – because if you’re going to fall off the food wagon, you should do it in style.

Effusive food writers would potter on endlessly with rich, colourful prose unpacking the subtle spice infusions, the heady flavours and incredible complimentary textures of the food laid out before me, but there’s no need for that sort of nonsense. 

Let’s keep it simple.

Fresh homemade white bread and butter, served with beef sausage in a Napolitana sauce. That’s just while you read the menu to decide what to eat. 

Starter. Burrata. Soft mozzarella with a warm creamy centre. 

 Main course. Tasmanian grass-fed beef sirloin with a thick Bearnaise sauce, baked potato and roast pumpkin. 

 Dessert. Frozen berries topped with hot white chocolate. 

Here are my thoughts:

Burrata should be the first thing you eat in heaven, just so you know you’re in heaven. Warm, soft cheese and cream? It’s seduction through your palate. With extra cream. And baby rosa tomatoes, basil and black pepper. And sighs of happiness. 

Tasmanian grass-fed beef is the closest you’ll get to the ecstasy of Wagyu beef without actually paying for  Wagyu beef or travelling to Kobe prefecture to eat the best version of Wagyu beef. A touch of marbling in the tender sirloin with a crispy side of rich, salty fat – sweet Mary, Mother of God! Or in other words, divine. 

Frozen berries in hot white chocolate. Listen to me – this is important: EVERYTHING in life needs to end with frozen berries in white hot chocolate. Everything. Sex. Your work day. Meetings. Walks on the beach. And dinner. Just add frozen berries in white hot chocolate. It’s the afterglow to good food porn I’ve always been looking for. 

So yes. I cheated. I cheated on all my good food intentions and I don’t regret a thing. Not one. I ate too much, but the pain is a good pain – like Fifty Shades of Grey, but for food. 

THIS food loves me. And it is good and proper to idolise this food.

Well played, Belthazar. Well played. 

© Dave Luis 2015. All Rights Reserved. 

Day 28: Frequency. 

Eat meals so many times a day. Do so many exercises at such and such time for x amount of minutes. Record it three times a day, and then blog it relentlessly.

It’s all a bit much, don’t you think?

So here’s the thing. I’m blogging about this less, because I want to write something meaningful. Not just a daily diary of how I didn’t gorge myself. How interminably dull. A lot like the meals I’m eating.

So, like less (food) is more (weightloss), fewer blog posts will track real milestones, not just a day count as an empty vanity achievement. 

It’s been 28 days. I’m eating less, and taking in much less sugar, no carbonated drinks, no sweets and no second helpings. I’ve lost a depressingly minuscule 500g, but on the upside my insomnia has all but disappeared. 

Watch this space for the next milestone, rather than the next day post. 

Yes. This feels like the right way to do it. 

© Dave Luis 2015. All Rights Reserved. 

Day 27: Need A Lift?

So. Today it clicked that taking the stairs instead of the lift translated into a bigger kilojoule allowance.

So. This means no more lift at work, I’ll just be using the stairs. The start of getting more active.

The upshot is that it’s another day of coming in under the daily kilojoule allowance. 

Also, the insanity of braving the V&A Waterfront on Black Friday helped a lot – the closest available parking felt like it was in Stellenbosch! I walked for bloody miles! Sheesh! 

© Dave Luis 2015. All Rights Reserved. 

Day 26: Give Me A Sub!

And by that, I mean a sub-9,000 kilojoule day – not a subway sandwich!

Result. Achievement. Goal. Today I ate well and came in 311 kilojoules below my daily allowance. 

This is particularly amazing as I am lying here in a state of almost-too-fullness after a night out at a sushi bar. Thanks to my predilection for sashimi rather than the rolls or fashion sandwiches, I ate spectacularly well tonight, and the kilojoules were low. 

I’m properly chuffed at the control I  exercised today, too. An office birthday saw me have just one cupcake and a tiny sliver of cake, and at dinner, I had half a scoop of ice-cream and chocolate sauce. So I got my sweet fix but still kept my kilojoules low.

So. What’s next, then? Day 27? Sure. Bring it on! 

© Dave Luis 2015. All Rights Reserved.

Day 25: Actual Results May Vary

There are no guarantees in life, really, are there? Ridiculously clichéd, that, because it’s true. 

Everything I am reading, all the apps I use, all the meal plans I research all come with intense disclaimers and fine print and escape clauses along the lines of ‘Actual Results May Vary’. 

Ordinarily, that sort of fey lack of commitment by the authors of this faddish advice would be reflected in my own fey lack of commitment to the cause. 

But something deliciously strange is happening. I can say “No.” to a whole lot more than I used to. To a whole lot more than I used to want to. 

I can already say “No.” to so much. 

Crystal meth? No.

Heroin? Hell no.

Cocaine? No, thank you. 

Cat? No, I’m good. 

And now I can say “No.” to things that are even more pervasive and even more widely available than mere soul-destroying drugs. Check it out:

Coke – the wet, bubbly kind? No, thanks. 

Fries? No.

Pancakes? No, not today.

White bread sandwich? Get the hell out of my face, you swine – but leave the cheese before you go!

I’m seeing results. Slowly. Nothing major, but I am pretty chuffed to see my daily calorie count is coming down and staying down. It’s not below the 8,990 kilojoule mark where it should be, but it’s pretty close. I can work on reducing it even more. 

This is progress. It tastes funny, and looks no different to stagnation – but it feels good

© Dave Luis 2015. All Rights Reserved. 

Day 24: Onwards and Downwards

Day 24: Onwards and Downwards

Today was the company year end function. 

Acres of free food and drink. Piles of rich, gorgeous desserts. 

Easy to say “Screw it, it’s a cheat day!” and be done with it – and to be fair, I did have two 200ml carbonated drinks and a bun with my lunch. But for the rest, I kept the portions small and enjoyed my food.

At the end of the day, my kilojoule count was low enough that I could tune out and get a McDonald’s burger for dinner, and still be on target.

Yes, McDonald’s is less than ideal – but here’s the thing: I ordered just one meal, and in total, my kilojoule count was just over the total day count – by a couple of hundred kilojoules, not several thousand. 

Winning…!….? Winning? No, not really. But definitely not losing the battle! 

© Dave Luis 2015. All Rights Reserved. 

Day 23: Thank You!

There was more control and much healthier eating today. There was even a half a slice of cheesecake, but I kept it all in the bounds of my 8,900 kilojoules.

But I don’t want to talk about that today. 

Today I want to say thank you to all my cheerleaders and supporters, who stop me and ask how it’s going; who comment on my blog and who just keep me grounded. 

Thank you. You help me pick up the reins again each morning.

The changes are small, but they’re there, and I can work with them.

Onwards, and at least as far as that scale is concerned, downwards. 

© Dave Luis 2015. All Rights Reserved.